Fire Jim Tracy

Saturday, December 18, 2004

Dodger Fans Jump the Shark

Shawn Green has waived his no-trade, an obvious sign in a free agent year that he's more confident in his ability to pout about hitting cleanup than repeat his Game 3 performance. I'm not sure if I would have done this if I were him, since if Tracy was my manager, I would at least know that even if I hit 0 for 150, my manager would still leave me in the cleanup spot, knowing that if he didn't, I could always whine to the pliable morons who staff the Los Angeles Times. A nice deal. Maybe he figured out that since Arizona will be making most of its news in the Business Section of the Arizona Republic for the next three to five years, the heat would be off him anyway.

Meanwhile, the saving of the Dodgers from Scott Boras goes on, even if no one has any interest than just throwing around the word "sucks" one thousand times. Now Konerko "sucks," Marte "sucks," Koplove "sucks," Navarro "sucks," Kent "sucks," and by the way, Cora is a better hitter.

Dodger fans are simply embarrassing themselves now. Just like when we were the laughingstock of the National League when Tracy kept pitching Nomo, we are now the laughingstock of the league because our fans can't use a single word of analysis other than the word "sucks."

Memo to Dodger Fan: Engage in one second of critical, original thinking. No wait. That's what led to the Cora/Kent comparison. Never mind. Just keep bleating. BAAAA! "We must give Adrian Beltre and Scott Boras whatever they want" BAAAA!!! "Every major league baseball player sucks unless they first spent time with the Las Vegas 51s" BAAA!! "We miss Shawn Green because he's a 'True Dodger' (defined as someone who screwed the team who drafted him and came here for more money)" BAAAAA!!! "Bring back Kevin Malone" BAAA!!!! "At least Kaz Ishii cares" BAAA!

DePodesta has done something that hadn't happened in years. He's made the casual Dodger fan care. This is perhaps the greatest mistake of all, because it turns out that the casual Dodger fan isn't any smarter than the drunken loons that populate New York and Boston. It's too bad, because if you're simply in this for the entertainment value, this is one hell of a ride.


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